ramps for seniors with dementia

There comes a time when adapting the home to the condition of your dementia patient becomes crucial. The minute we introduced a walker into our house, I had to take up most of the rugs, particularly in the bedroom and halls. I also noticed that my mother was more and more apprehensive of making the one step down to the garage or to the patio, and I always was there "just in case". I hadn't really thought about a ramp because my mother, as most dementia patients, hates change and didn't want to change the appearance of her home, particularly as, in her mind, she had not changed so there was no need to. Nevertheless, her legs were weakening from the lack of activity and she had neither the strength nor the balance to make the step easily.

Of course when she later temporarily lost the use of her legs and had to spend 3 weeks in rehab, we had a serious problem. I constructed a temporary ramp out of old second-hand murder mysteries (thank goodness we are avid readers!) with roofing tiles laid over them. I wish I had taken a picture! It was pretty solid, but definitely temporary. Even the handyman had to admire it. Thank goodness he was able to put together an excellent one in an afternoon. Ours is wood which is no problem since it is inside the garage, and it is made specifically to our requirements: it is quite wide so that my mother doesn't fall off while trying to get around the dogs and it is a VERY gentle slope so that she doesn't balk at using it on her own. She feels much more independent with it: she can go sit outside to watch the dogs in the yard (she is afraid they will somehow get out the gate). Fortunately my mother does not have the wandering problems associated with Alzheimer's.

While I had not been able to find an appropriate ramp in the stores near us, I subsequently found that they are readily available on the Web. My favorite Allegro Medical Supply has quite a nice choice of ramps according to your personal needs and at good prices.

We were able to have one made reasonably ($100) by a handyman whom we had already had dealt with. If you don't know a handyman though, I can suggest that you contact your local Alzheimer's Association. They will most certainly be able to refer you to a "senior assistance and referral network" which will guarantee that the people you are put in contact with are "Elder Friendly" businesses. This is particularly reassuring when you come from out of state and don't know how or where to start.

time for respite

The need for respite care is something that appears OVER and OVER, on all the caregiver sites, as being crucial. I personally was not ready to pay too much attention to that advice when I first moved in with my mother a year ago. First the physical and mental changes in her were so dramatic that I couldn't imagine thinking about anything BUT her. The first few months of watching her every step, controlling her diet, dealing with her memory loss, calling 911 left my head spinning. I DIDN'T want to join a chat or compare notes. I didn't want help because I was convinced I didn't need help. I certainly didn't want to leave her to someone else's care to take time for respite. I was convinced that I was essential to her well-being.

Then her health started to improve. Of course. As any health care person can tell you, the better the person is cared for, generally the more he or she will thrive. All of a sudden I realized that we were no longer in an "emergency" situation. My constant physical presence was no long really crucial. My mother was even able to move back to her room instead of the guestroom next to mine. I finally realized that I was in this for the long run. The person who now needed help was me. The notion of finding "time for respite" started to make sense. Caregiving is an incredible balance of self-abnegation and self-recognition. It is essential that the caregiver be aware of what he or she can or is willing to do. Many caregivers have family members or friends who are willing to take over the care duties for a time so that the caregiver can become his/herself for a while, take a little time for respite. For others, things are a little more difficult.

Our own family is so spread out that I find myself totally alone for the day-to-day care. I have great support from my family through the phone and e-mails, but that doesn't really help me be me. I needed respite, so back to the Web! I think the main source of information was www.eldercare.gov. More than just the respite issue, this site addresses many other aspects of taking care of a senior. It also allows you to discover what is available in advice and assistance in your area. Attending caregiver training sessions allows you to see that you are not alone... and that your situation is far from the worst!!